July is indeed a very beautiful woman…

We used to be neighbors since our early childhood. Now, we have moved to different parts of town, yet I see her from time to time during social functions and some official conventions as both of us became doctors of medicine. I saw her yesterday when she came to the hospital where I worked, checking on one of her patients. I offered to treat her for a cup of coffee at the cafeteria, and she kindly agreed.. we talked about the usual professional topics, and then I said,

               “Dear July, you have not lost any of your charm or beauty, what is your secret?”  I remarked courteously sipping my coffee. She giggled answering,

               “No ? I think I am getting old.. so I just try to stay away from all the usual intrigue.”

               “well, how is your husband Tim?” I asked innocently.

July, the beautiful, suddenly changed…

               “you don’t know what happened?” she asked sharply.

I was alarmed and confused.. I just shook my head negatively, almost unwilling to hear her answer.

               “we are divorced, that animal was cheating on me.” She volunteered to tell me anyway.

               “Oh, I am sorry to hear that.” I stammered..

She started to tell me about the ordeal and while she was speaking, I began to see a completely different person.. the inner person revealing herself before me was so ugly and scary, it was almost impossible to recognize… even her beautiful face, gradually became contorted and out of shape.. I wished I could stop her talking, but I wouldn’t dare interrupt.. she only stopped when she became so exhausted, looked at her watch, and stood up saying,

               “I have to go.. I must pick up my son from school.”

She left without waiting for my response…

That evening, as I was driving back home, I recalled this conversation, and wondered… is it possible that a human being who is so beautiful on the outside, be so horribly ugly on the inside? How could this happen?

A few days later I met my friend Joseph at a conference, and we had a little chat during the break. July’s divorce came up during the conversation…

               “Wow.. you didn’t know about that? The whole country seemed to talk about it. She ruined his reputation, the poor man.” Joe said.

               “Say what? She told me that he cheated on her?” I was shocked.

               “No my friend.. she found a better option.. a fat cat from France, so she fabricated this story to get rid of Tim.. she claimed he was gay and was unable to carry his duties as a husband and a father.” I was so stunned I couldn’t speak for a long while… then I said, ever so slowly..

               “Tim… the playboy of medical school… the man who had more girlfriends than all of us combined… it’s unthinkable..”

               “Yes sir… and the irony of it all, is that after that horrible divorce trials, the Frenchman, left her to eat the dust..” Joe said sarcastically..

               “of course.. if she did that to a man like Timothy, she would easily do it to him whenever she wanted to.” I said shaking my head in sorrow, “but why .. why call him gay when she .. and all of us knew very well he was not..?”

               “I think because when she asked for divorce, he refused, and preferred to go to counseling in order to save his marriage.. he couldn’t believe she was so crazed by the other man… this was her way of revenge… she saw him once talking to a hustler called Ryan.. and that was the end of that..”

               “Ryan? The gay anatomy instructor?” I asked

               “Yep.. he does some work now at the coroner’s office as a consultant..”

That night, I was sitting home alone trying to finish my paperwork so that I could join my wife and children at the beach house.. but the images of July, Timothy and Ryan kept creeping into my mind with so many memories of the school days…

Timothy was the heartthrob of all the girls in the whole school..

July was treated like a queen ..

And Ryan… Ryan, was well known for his escapades.. and never cared about people’s opinion of him.. he was brilliant and at the top of his class.. so he shrugged off any criticism and never shied of soliciting the affections of same minded men..

Then my thoughts settled on the beautiful face of July… and as I went over the perfect features and enchanting smile.. the horrible contorted features I saw at the cafeteria began to flash over the same beautiful face.. her words ringing in my ears, describing the cheating Tim … all these blatant lies.. she fabricated so fluidly and convincingly that I had no problem believing her.. even though I knew the man she was talking about very well and under any other circumstances I would never have believed a word of it about him.. Oh, July, How can anybody be so beautiful and yet so ugly..?

Then my whole body shook and my mind froze for a moment…

A question popped up and blocked out everything else.. when this body goes into the dust… how does that soul look like?..

Then I remembered Juliette…. The kind, timid and flat faced Juliette.. she was madly in love with Martin, when we were in high school.. he tormented her .. humiliated her, and let the whole school finally call her flat face because she looked plain and pale, and seemed to come from a poor family which couldn’t afford her some decent clothes.. she ended up dropping out of school.. and we never knew anything about her, until, a year later, her picture appeared in the papers as a runaway who died of a cocaine overdose .. all our class had graduated, and I never knew how that affected the others, but it haunted me for a while, until I met my wife Joan and forgot the whole story.. Oh, Joan..

I had to smile to myself…

               “Of all the girls you know, how could you choose this ugly one? My mother hounded me.

               “Mom, Joan is beautiful.. I love her, and she loves me.. end of story.”

Truthfully I never noticed any exceptional features about Joan.. we always engaged in intellectual discussions .. sometimes we disagreed sharply, but that is when our argument always ended up in kiss. She is a funny, cheerful and witty woman, which makes it so comforting to be around her.. I know about myself, that I am the kind of man who is hard to please.. yes, call me what you like, but I always want perfection in everything, and I know it is very tedious for me and for everyone around.. but even when Joan complains, she does it in a manner that disarms me.. I don’t know how, but she had been the only person who could do that.. my mother was very jealous of this, and made fun of it, she used to say sarcastically,

               “Oh, John is angry?… go get Joan, she can easily put out the fire…” and everyone would laugh.I finished my paperwork and got ready to drive to the beach house.. I took a last look at my face in the mirror next to the door.. I am always mindful of my ugly double chin.. which I hide carefully by a small well groomed goatee .. and as I got into my car, I realized.. some people do not mind allowing their deep inner soul shine through to the outside world.. as if they have nothing to hide..  which is the secret of their REAL beauty, and some people try to hide their real ugliness behind a face which may be deceptively beautiful ..even if they have to use heavy makeup, or ..eh..for a man ..grow a goatee ..